“Do not look where you fell, but where you slipped” – Liberian (Vai) proverb
In life people tend to dwell on the mistakes. The “could’ve” “would’ve” and missed opportunities or their current circumstances.
Take note of what got you off track. For me, last year I realized that I had allowed way too many people to place demands on my life and my time.
Everyone was calling me for advice or just to chat or to “turn up” but who was calling me to do viable business with me? I was creating opportunities for free for everyone and it was taking time away from the time I needed to a) make and b) improve myself and skill sets.
I was motivating everyone and those hours per week were more than the equivalent to a part time job.
Am I still there for my friends? Of course. But unlike most people who have one or two good friends I have many close friends and I couldn’t be everywhere or on the phone all the time.
Guilt. To be productive you have to defeat your own guilt when you say no to people making demands on your time. You also have to be able to navigate those who believe it is ok to use guilt to persuade you to do things you do not want to do. I realized that people would ask me to do things they knew I had no interest in doing or had no time for. They were selfishly thinking of their own desires and gratification. I needed to be selfish for a change and feel guiltless in the process.
Let go of the guilt. All of it.
I couldn’t be a part of everyone’s projects or pathway to their own personal success. Learn to say no. Part of being productive is being selective about where or who you invest your energy and time in.
Everyone wants to be “put on” but who are they “putting on”? I was the plug for everyone and everything. It was slowly eating away at my quality of life and I need to recharge and overhaul everything.
I also realized began to reflect on my past habits and patterns. When had I been most productive and successful? What were my habits?
I started to go back to what had first propelled me to success in school and grad school. My grind. Being antisocial. Putting my goals first. Using my time wisely. Saying no to others but yes to myself.
People don’t know this but I wake up almost every morning at around 5 am and grind.
If you want to be a boss. You have to pay the cost. What have you learned from the most successful periods in your life? What habits or routines did you have?
You don’t always have to reinvent the wheel.
