THOU SHALL SAVE YOURSELF FIRST
In my previous posts on entrepreneurship, I first spoke on the need to not take on everyone’s burdens as well as how to protect one’s mental space. In the second post in this series I discussed an issue that plagues many of us–the importance of deciding who to do business with.
Here, I wanted to dig deep into the concept of “saving one’s self” and self-care for entrepreneurs or anyone building a brand. As you began to build yourself and become more centered others notice and they will start to gravitate towards you for various reasons. They admire you or your work ethic. They have a project they want you to be part of. They need you to rescue them. They have an issue they feel you may have the solution to. It can be a never ending stream of reasons why people want you to SAVE them or become their personal motivator or rescuer. Before you pull your cape on, take a moment to think if you have FIRST “saved” yourself.
Here are the four mantras or quotes that I am highlighting in this series:
1.“A lot of what weighs you down isn’t yours to carry” ( see part 1 to read )
2. “People who save everyone, usually don’t save themselves”
3. “One of the most important things you could learn in life is who to do business with and who to just be friends with.” (see part 2 to read )
4. “I’m willing to do whatever it takes to ensure that my energy and mental health are both in order. Never take it personal if I have to keep to myself. It’s how I recharge and regroup so I can be the best version of me.”
Why is it so hard for people to save themselves?! Well, for starters we live in a world where people thrive off of interaction. Many people who have problems don’t look to solve their own problems; they look to you and others to provide solutions or to serve as a sounding board. That’s great if you have a wealth of free time, but for your average entrepreneur time is precious and everyone problem you solve for someone else is time that can’t be returned. We often appear the good person to ask for advice or counsel because we are actively productive and people respect that quality. Still, the truth is entrepreneurs are often working even if everything else in their life is not ideal or in the face of their own issues, health problems or crisis. Starting a side business and maintaining a 9 to 5 can mean you have even less time. Take care of home first and even within your home; save yourself. My mom always says life is like an airline flight, you put the oxygen mask on first before you turn and help others.
Don’t know where to start?! You are not alone. Make a list of things you need to handle to restore yourself to your best version. Try to work on those in a practical manner. Start evaluating your interactions with people. Is every call or text a question or favor? These are people who need you to save them and you need to make sure you balance your time appropriately when interacting with them. It doesn’t mean they are bad individuals, they just are very needy and you have the power and right to limit their neediness and access to your time.
Saving yourself. Saving yourself could be something as simple as implementing a new spiritual routine or even daily exercise to clear your head. If you have deadlines or projects that must get done to move your company or brand forward make sure those items get done as a priority before tackling others’ projects. Remind yourself daily or weekly or however often you need to so you can rest in case you find yourself putting out everyone else’s fires instead of your own.
Be positive. Be smart with your decision making. Even heroes have to recharge. And so do you.
