Open Letter to Gilbert Arenas
Gilbert,
I have Asian girlfriends who aren’t attracted to Asian guys and white male friends who prefer dating ethnic women because the color contrast when they “enter” heightens their arousal.
From tastes in food to palates for partners, the right to choose is an intrinsic part of our human experience.
So, Gilbert Arenas, no judgment for liking whatever and disliking whomever. No problem there.
Except you created a huge problem. Oh, and I must preface this by acknowledging your candid apology.
Thanks?
Daily – on IG and in real life – I encounter women who I consider to be just as and more beautiful than Beyonce (no shade, BeyHive). However, across multiple platforms, we’re constantly inundated with Queen Bey and women who share similar physical attributes – the JLos, Rihannas, the Kim Ks – and we’ve been conditioned to think that they’re the only prototypes.
Listen, it’s worth recognizing that science behind beauty exists. Also worth noting: Darkness frightens people. Darkness represents the mysterious, the unconquered. You gotta be properly equipped to navigate darkness. Whether it’s the solar system, a windowless bedroom in the middle of night or the complexities buried beneath the outer shells of dark women who shoulder society’s melanin-rich stigmas, deciphering darkness can be tricky.
It’s human nature to gravitate towards that with which we’re most familiar. Simply put, No Chill Gil, it’s likely your little girls will grow up and have kids with a man who looks like their daddy which means your future granddaughters might very well be as dark as Lupita or Serena or God forbid, as I. You, Grandpa Gil, will think they’re beautiful; some social media antagonist – perhaps one of your former teammate’s black sons — will regard North West as beauty’s gold standard and will publicly shame your dark-skinned grands.
Let that sink in.
Have your preference; we’ve all got our own. BUT be more sensitive to the women who raised you, birthed you, support you and who’ll succeed you. You ain’t gotta date ‘em, but on principle alone and for the sake of being a positive example for your own kids, respect them.
Article by Erica Davis
Erica Davis is a former Nfl cheerleader, writer and actress. Davis is also a Sports & Entertainment host for After Buzz TV, Black Hollywood Live and Dr. Drew. Erica is a fun, fabulous and fearless addition to the Cachet Digital team. Instagram: @EricaRenneeD Twitter: @EricaReneeD
